Trading Yesterday

Wow. It's been so long since I posted. And I come on here with nothing really to say...

At the moment, the two songs with the most heavy rotation in my head and on my laptop are quite literally giving opposing messages. Story of my life I suppose.

Anyways, the first song is called Shattered by Trading Yesterday

And Ive lost who I am
And I can't understand
Why my heart is so broken
Rejecting your love
Without love gone wrong
Lifeless words
Carry on

...

All this time spent in vain
Wasted years
Wasted gain
All is lost
Hope remains
And this war's not over

Theres a light
Theres the sun
Taking all the shattered ones
To the place we belong
And His love will conquer all
Yes His love will conquer all


That one speaks about having hope and maintaining faith. The next song, however, does not. It is called My Ghost by Glass Pear.


Who can you trust, in this place?
In whom can I put my faith?
If you're real, then show me now,
Who you are.

How can I love, without grace?
Shine a light on your face,
If you're real, then show me now,
Who you are.

...

Who can you trust, in this place?
Where can I put my face?
If God is love, then why's the world the way it is?

...

PMPs and being broke

Since it took me two months to find a job after I arrive, almost 3 1/2 months before I started and then an entire month before I got paid at the end of January, my savings reserves were nearly empty as the end of January approached. Being very cognizant of my money situation I tried not to spend too much, but a couple unavoidable and unexpected spending situations later I was pushing it.

Then I started thinking seriously about buying a portable media player (PMP).

I watch or was following at least 15 TV shows. Lately, of course, with work, family and all I can only keep up with around 5 of them. Now, I commute roughly 3 1/2 hours round-trip every day by public transportation. I can't afford to buy books to read all the time and even when I take the 2 free daily newspapers, I finish reading them by the end of one way of my journey. So I figured I could kill two birds with one stone by getting a PMP: thereby decreasing my boredom and at the same time catching up with my tv shows.

I did not really want an iPod. I am a little bit against Apple. My thing against Apple is that while their designs are indeed great, it does not justify the very high prices for the small amount of features/hardware/space that their computers. laptops or media players come with...I really wanted something under $200 but then after seeing what I could get for a bit more my budget went up. After doing my research it came down to the Archos 705 with wi-fi or the Cowon D2. Now there are later models of both the Archos and the Cowon but for best bang for my buck these earlier models are way cheaper, serve just as well and have a plethora of features. I was leaning towards the Archos because of the features but it bothered me that I had to pay $20 a pop to take advantage of the cool features (for instance the web browser). However, Futureshop had a sale on the Archos 705 wi-fi 80GB model going for $250 and even if I bought a couple of the plugins it would be just a bit over $300..about the same / less than an iTouch and with way more features and space.

So I was all set to buy the PMP as an extremely early bday present for myself (and just not spend money for a couple months) :). But alas, it was not to be. The Monday after the same weekend I got all excited about getting a PMP, I discovered that I had misplaced $130. Someone may have stolen it. This isn't the first time something like this has happened to me but usually my financial state is much more stable. I mean who loses $130? That is so much money....and with losing that mount of money went my dreams of getting the PMP sooner rather than later. I would feel way too guilty if I got it now. So I guess I just have to steel myself to get used to trudging along (in the colde) on my way too long daily commute for a few more months.

Here is to 2009!

Happy New Year everyone!

I know it has been a while since last I wrote and it has been a while since I updated regularly. You would think that since I wasn't working it would be quite the opposite but alas. Anyways, with the new year comes new opportunities...at least for me :). I start my new job on Monday as a web developer at a cool startup! Besides looking forward to getting out of the house, I am pretty excited to start working. Plus, it will be my first real full-time salaried job.

Since I got back from France I have been getting rid of junk (old crap) in my room and my junk in general to mark the new phase in my life. I have spent countless hours on this task as I, like everyone else in my family, am a pack rat. I had loads of stuff that my family brought over from Jamaica and that I brought from college in the States....5 big boxes that really had not been opened since I placed them in my closet 5 years ago when my family moved to where we live now. Add this to all the junk I accumulated since those 5 years we have been living here and oh the things I have been finding.

The amount of paper I already shredded is garbage bags upon garbage bags worth...bank statements, monthly bills, receipts, once important documents and basically anything with my name on it. And then all the recycled paper in the form of old newspapers, notebooks, scrap paper, useless paper, etc. With all the paper I find I get more annoyed. Of all the places I have lived, no set of people waste more paper than those in North America. About a month into the cleaning, I got rid of almost all junk paper in my room. However, I kept getting bank/credit card/bill statements and worst of all countless junk letters reminding me to service my car, give money to some charity, enter a lottery this year, buy this product, try some other product or service, give money to my alma maters or some other crap. It just never ends. I am so going to sign up for paperless bank/credit card/bill statements. And I don't care if there are recycling programs in place. If people didn't send out those darn solicitation letters then my and my family's junk paper, i.e. paper recycling pile, would be reduced by at least 75%. As an example, I think at least 50% of the the weekend Toronto Star is filled with inserts. When we lived in Jamaica there were barely inserts in the paper. Of course, this is probably because a great part of the population could not afford much more beyond basic necessities or because Jamaica is not/does not have the means to be as capitalist as North America. But I digress...

In addition to finding lots of paper during my cleaning, there are all the times I find things that make me nostalgic (happens about once every 1/2hr) like high school yearbooks from grade 9 onwards, prep school and high school report cards and exam results (oh how I long for the days when I was smart!), cards received from my friends while at college in the States, emails I saved from my family when I was in college in the States, papers/exams/assignments from university courses, flight tickets and entrance tickets from trips I went on and the list goes on. I even found a list done in my last year of high school in a personal development class which had the top 10 things I expected to be most important in my life in the future. These trips down memory lane have no doubt contributed to the length of time it is taking me to clean up. The further down in the boxes I got, the further back in history my mind traveled. Thankfully, I am about 80% done with the cleaning now and my room is now starting to look less cluttered. I look forward to being done.

Anyways, I get especially grateful every new year to be given the opportunity to live to see another year. I am grateful to God for everything he did for me this past year and all that he is doing and, come what may, what he will continue to do for me. I wish for everyone, especially my friends and loved ones a year filled with lots of laughter, much loving, prosperity and all things good.